Shoes are commonly left at the front door of houses and
some other buildings.
A collection of shoes at the door is a giveaway that you
may have to remove your shoes. Another sign is if you notice
you are the only one wearing shoes!
Many Malaysians greet each other with a less than firm handshake
and may then place their right hand over their heart after
greeting you. Watch what happens and follow their lead.
In the city, the presentation of business cards or name
cards often follow an introduction as a sign of interest
in keeping contact with you, either socially or for business
purposes. It is actually your prerogative; so use your discretion
if it is wise to give your card or kindly excuse yourself
for not carrying any of your own. But in doing business,
it is a common practice though not compulsory.
Physical
signs of affection in public are frowned upon and on the
East Coast of Malaysia, men and women keep a safe distance
from each other in public.
There
are certain areas of mosques that should not be entered
by non-Moslems. Signs are often displayed or people will
inform you. Conservative dress is always required in all
parts of mosques.
Many
older people are simply referred to as "uncle"
(pakcik) or "aunty" (makcik). People younger than
you may also address you with such a term - take it as a
compliment. Many people bow their heads as they walk past
people, especially older folk.
Some Malaysians eat with their hand. In many restaurants
this is more than acceptable and well worth trying (saves
waiting for the cutlery!). A tip though - only use the right
hand as the left is used for more basic bodily functions.
If invited to a Malaysian home, the host will be most appreciative
if you come bearing gifts, though this is not a must. Whatever
you choose to bring - be it a souvenir from back home, some
fruits or drinks purchased from a store around the corner
- rest assured it would be welcomed sincerely. Even amongst
Malaysians themselves, this practice is observed. Bringing
a gift is known as carrying buah tangan, which literally
means "fruit of the hands".
Many Malaysians
are superstitious and there is a fascination with lucky
numbers (essential for buying favourable numbers in lottery
draws). Ask a Malaysian to explain this interest or when
they jot down car license numbers at the scene of an accident.
There
is a Chinese word called "kiasu". The English
translation means something like "the fear of missing
out". This surfaces in many situations - drivers being
aggressive on the road, wearing branded clothes and accessories,
using mobile phones loudly and piling one's plate the highest
at a buffet. What does it all mean? It's about keeping up
with the Jones's, it's about, "I'm as good as you",
etc. This doesn't mean expats have to be kiasu, but being
aware of its presence will help you understand many situations.
As in many Asian countries, Malaysians don't often show
anger in public. When others do, many Malaysians are unsure
of what to do next. Remain calm, firm and avoid shouting
when things do not go your way. Something may be resolved
if you are calm, but nothing will be achieved through ranting
and raving.
Many Malaysians do not want to disappoint foreigners so
a "yes" may not actually be in the affirmative.
If you need a definite answer you might try and talk around
a topic for awhile until you determine whether it is a real
"yes" or a "no-yes".
This
has a lot to do with "face". Face is another difficult
concept to explain but most Malaysians do not like to "lose
face" - i.e., they do not want to give the wrong information
or to be caught out, no matter what. You can "give
face" by being understanding if something goes wrong;
by not reminding people of this, by compensating for small
mistakes and/or by not making a public spectacle. A difficult
one, but very important for surviving in many Asian countries.
Try and be a little humble - be honest about your faults
and modest about your achievements.